Attachment: Parenting Through the Hard Stuff
April 30, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment, attachment activities, baby-wearing, Theraplay, Trust Based Parenting, working mom
A few weeks ago we read a post on Lauren’s blog and thought it would be an excellent resource to share here. Lauren was gracious enough to allow us to use it. There is so much good stuff, we broke it down into two posts, this is post two, post one is here. Thank you, Lauren, …Read More
Urgent Medical Need: Justus
April 30, 2015
Family Found
Adorable Justus is 2 years old (born December 2012). Justus is a very smart little boy that already knows how to sort shapes and colors, point out and say objects in a book, and say several words! He gets along well with other kids and loves to ride on the rocking horse and play catch …Read More
Attachment: Room By Room
April 28, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment, attachment activities, co-sleeping, Trust Based Parenting
A few weeks ago we read this post on Lauren’s blog and thought it would be an excellent resource to share here. Lauren was gracious enough to allow us to use it. There is so much good stuff, we broke it down into two posts, this being post one, with post two to follow shortly. Thank …Read More
find my family: Cricket
April 28, 2015
Family Found
Cricket was born July 2011 and is designated to Dillon International. Cricket is a beautiful 3-year-old boy who needs a family who has access to the medical resources necessary to treat his pulmonary artery stenosis and his right wrist. He prefers to try to do things for himself and takes great pride in accomplishing a …Read More
Mama’s Not Feelin’ It: 6 Things I’ve Learned in My Journey to Attach
April 27, 2015
Attachment, Carrie, parent-to-child attachment, Trust Based Parenting
We just hit our one year anniversary with our daughter, and I have told more than one person that I think we all deserve medals. We didn’t have a dramatic first year full of major medical challenges or severe behaviors. Ours was the more everyday-garden-variety of adoption stress and trauma. I’m thankful we didn’t walk …Read More
find my family: Abby
April 26, 2015
Family Found
Beautiful little Abby loves to smile and interact with her caregivers and those around her. She enjoys listening to music and loves things that are new to her. She likes playing outdoors and her caregivers say that she is very active and extroverted. Abby suffered from a rough start with some developmental delays and wasn’t …Read More
How To Get Out From Under Our Expectations
April 24, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment, Trust Based Parenting
Eryn shared with us last week in her post, The Burden of Expectations, that we all have expectations that we carry into our adoptions, and how these expectations can lead to significant parenting mistakes in we don’t recognize them. Today Eryn follows up her original post with five practical suggestions on how to get out from under these expectations. So what are some …Read More
Let Tomorrow Be Tomorrow
April 23, 2015
Rebecca
The surgeon walked out in his blue scrubs, mask still hanging around his neck, and found us awaiting word that the surgery was over. The stitching, repairing, and testing was complete, and he offered reassurance. But, as we tend to do, we pressed. What is the prognosis? How long is recovery? How much pain? Worst case scenario? When is …Read More
find my family: Evie
April 22, 2015
Family Found
Precious 1.5 year old Evie is newly listed with Madison Adoption Associates via an orphanage partnership. Evie is diagnosed with deformed limbs, sinus tract in lumbosacral region, developmental delay. At the age of 7-9 months, Evie could roll over and began to pay attention to the environment around her. Between 10 and 12 months, she …Read More
Building Memorials
April 21, 2015
adopting as a single mom, Desiree, working mom
Adoptive families are no stranger to fighting the good fight. We fight to bring our children home, through multiple levels of bureaucracy, sometimes through the government requirements of multiple countries. We battle cultural, language and jet lag barriers to have our child placed in our arms. Then the real struggles seem to begin: We fight …Read More
Adopting a Child with a Lipomyelomeningocele
April 20, 2015
April 2015 Feature CNS, Family Stories, lipomyelomeningocele
We knew we felt called to adopt, and called to China, but when we found out we’d need to go through the special focus route, we were afraid… Special needs? Those words encompass a lot. Locally we had a friend who had a precious daughter from China with spina bifida. This friend had spent a …Read More
The Most Forgotten Habit for Healthy Attachment
April 17, 2015
Andrea Y., Attachment
I set out to share with you how many years later I’m still working on attachment with my most precious children. Forming and maintaining healthy attachment is something as parents we will work a lifetime on with both our adopted and biological children. I wanted to share with you ways we have little “connection checks” …Read More
The Burden of Expectations
April 17, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment
I will always remember the first time I made an attachment blunder. My three children had only been home a week. It was a traumatic moment for both my daughter and myself. She was two and I was trying to “set limits” by telling her what she can and cannot do with the toys. She …Read More
a family for Rosie
April 16, 2015
Down syndrome, Family Found, International China Concern, Stefanie
I first learned about this precious girl on the Down Syndrome Adoption FB group and was immediately smitten. And when you see her picture, I’m sure you’ll agree. Those chubby legs. That black hair. Those pink cheeks. Oh my. Now that we are home with our Clementine, who also has Down syndrome, I have such a huge soft …Read More
Attachment: What’s Worked For Us
April 15, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Jean, large families, older child adoption
I would say we are experienced in attachment but we are by no means experts. After adopting 13 children we have had quite a bit of “on the job” training! Ten of our adoptions have been with children between the ages of 5-11. Our daughter adopted at 11 years 3 months was not prepared to …Read More
Adopting a Child with Tuberous Sclerosis
April 14, 2015
April 2015 Feature CNS, Central Nervous System, epilepsy, Family Stories, seizures, tuberous sclerosis
If you have ever adopted from China before, you remember sitting at the table staring at that dreaded form asking you what special needs you thought you and your family could handle. Filling it out seemed cruel. On the one hand most of them scared me to death and at the same time it filled …Read More
find my family: Brayden
April 14, 2015
Family Found
Brayden was born in April 2012 and abandoned when he was 18 months old. After admission to the hospital he was diagnosed with Hemophilia A. His birth parents did leave a note so it is believed that his birth date is known. After spending about 6 months in a Care Center Brayden was transferred to …Read More
to love one
April 13, 2015
Hannah, orphanage realities
She stands in the middle of the room, children at her feet. Some are fighting each other for her, the rest are begging to be picked up. A little girl with albinism sees me standing in the doorway and runs over, arms spread wide and high. I bend down and pick her up and within …Read More
find my family: Maria
April 12, 2015
Family Found
Maria is 18 months old. She was born with a cleft lip and palate and was abandoned on the side of the road on the day she was born. She’s been getting great care in the orphanage (now living with a foster family within the orphanage) and is doing well. Maria also has a small …Read More
Getting Closer
April 11, 2015
Amy, Attachment, co-sleeping, cocooning, Trust Based Parenting
Our daughter was nineteen months and four days old when she was handed to us in an alley outside the Civil Affairs office in north west China. We read and prepared as much as we could to attach to each other in a healthy way. We followed all of the rules as best we could. …Read More
co-sleeping is king
April 10, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment, co-sleeping, Stefanie, Trust Based Parenting
April is here and the focus at No Hands But Ours is attachment, so I thought I’d share our experience with attachment and what has worked for us. Because, having 12 children (8 children adopted from China in the last 10 years), we have lots of experience with attachment. Successes and failures, and everything in …Read More
aging out child: Joseph
April 10, 2015
Family Found
Joseph was born in October 2001 and his special need is repaired cleft lip and repaired cleft palate. I had the sincere pleasure of getting to meet him this past July while I was in China. He lives in a foster care apartment within his orphanage with two older sisters and three younger siblings. Joseph …Read More
Adopting a Child with Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy
April 8, 2015
April 2015 Feature CNS, Central Nervous System, Family Stories, hypoxic ischemic encephalopathy, strabismus
There are the ‘facts,’ and then there’s the reality. The file says HIE, Hypoxic Ischemic Encephalopathy, but what does it really mean? Brain damage that occurs when an infant’s brain doesn’t receive enough oxygen and blood, either immediately before, during or after birth, is commonly called HIE. But our Creator fashioned our brain in such …Read More
Staying Present and Connected while Across the Ocean
April 7, 2015
adopting again, Amy A., Attachment, travel tips
When my husband and I left for China in October 2013, we left our two biological sons at home with their grandparents. We were very intentional in preparing them for our trip and took many steps to make the 17 days apart as comfortable as possible for them. Here we are, not even two years …Read More
Lean In to the Author of Your Story
April 6, 2015
adoption realities, books, guest post
Each adoption tells a story. When our family was in the midst of the laborious form-filling, check-writing, waiting, waiting, waiting stage of our daughter Lucy’s adoption, we had plenty of time to envision how our story—how Lucy’s story—would go. We had plenty of education, you see. We read and re-read The Connected Child, we attended …Read More
I Missed You.
April 5, 2015
Jennifer
“I missed you when you weren’t in China yet.” Resurrection is on my lips and in my heart and looking back I missed Him when I realize there were years I didn’t know Him. How we miss someone we didn’t even know yet is a beautiful mystery of the heart. There were seasons where He …Read More
Attachment: the first few months
April 3, 2015
April/May 2015 Feature Attachment, Attachment, first year home, Whitney
April is here and with it’s arrival we usher in a new series on No Hands But Ours. This month we will feature posts on attachment. Because bringing a new little person into an already established family isn’t easy. This month we will share real-life stories from mamas going through the attachment struggle at all stages of …Read More
find my family: Ruby
April 2, 2015
Family Found
Ruby is six years old and listed with Madison Adoption Associates. She lives with a foster family, who try their best to help her practice walking without assistance. Sara’s special need is listed as Cerebral Palsy. She can speak in full sentences, although her speech can be low and just a bit slow. She can …Read More
Adopting a Child with Hydrocephalus
April 1, 2015
April 2015 Feature CNS, Central Nervous System, Family Stories, hydrocephalus, myelomeningocele, spina bifida
I’ve had this conversation with prospective adoptive parents at least six times in six months, after they hear that my sweet two-year-old girl has Spina Bifida (but before they realize she has hydrocephalus). Me: Oh, so, you have Spina Bifida on your medical checklist? Them: Yep! Me: Do you have hydrocephalus too? Them: No…it’s scary. …Read More