Gotcha Day

June 5, 2013 heart defect, older child adoption, Tara 12 Comments

It was two-and-a-half years ago that I approached the very same building and found a precious baby boy already inside waiting for me. That was the moment I had dreamed of for so many years…I was finally adopting from China. Today was a different scenario. I found myself waiting (not so patiently) in that room …Read More

miles to go

June 1, 2013 first weeks home, first year home, heart defect, Kam 1 Comments

So the little prince and I were at Target the other day when my phone rang. Our dear friends needed a little help and thought of us… Because she said, “You guys ‘get it!’” And I guess she’s right about that. They have been home from China for six months with their sweet boy and …Read More

Chinese Cowpokes

May 5, 2013 heart defect, Tara 1 Comments

The process of watching an adopted child become a part of their family is beautiful to behold. The “Gotcha Day” videos get me every time. But beyond that comes the intertwining that takes place over time. My husband and I already had three biological children when we adopted our son from China in 2010. And …Read More

Everyday girl

April 11, 2013 heart defect, Kristi, port wine stain, vision issues 3 Comments

I watch her run across the yard, her straight, black ponytail bouncing over her self-selected outfit (which today, for once, is rather tame) and from the back she seems like just any other, everyday, six year old girl. Then something grabs her attention and she turns around. As she glances past me her face breaks into …Read More

The Broken Point

April 5, 2013 heart defect, Tara 4 Comments

My husband and I are in the throes of adoption for yet a third time.  I think any adoptive parent would tell you that the process isn’t easy.  It’s frustrating and disappointing.  Rarely are the waits shorter than you expected or the news better than you expected to hear. Last week was one of *those* …Read More

not in a million years

April 2, 2013 heart defect, hypospadias, Kam, Urogenital System 3 Comments

So I’m a moron. I mean it. A complete and total dork. My idiocy seems to come out NOT in front of fellow idiots, but around uber smart, genius type people. You know, those who intimidate the heck out of you and before whom you know ahead of time that you should just keep your …Read More

A Special Family

March 5, 2013 heart defect, Tara 2 Comments

Recently one of my friends directed me to a quote that ended with the phrase, “Raising a child with special needs doesn’t TAKE a special family, it MAKES a special family.” I’m a lover of quotes, but this one especially resonated with me. Not just because I’ve adopted two children with special needs and am …Read More

one thing remains

March 3, 2013 heart defect, Kam 5 Comments

Well, February came and went like a flash, didn’t it? And I don’t know about you, or what the neck of the woods you call home feels like today…but my neck and my woods feel COLD! So, Hello March! This mama is soooo happy to see you. Because March means spring is just around the …Read More

Finding Mommy

February 5, 2013 heart defect, Tara 3 Comments

When I adopted my son in 2010, I did the “marathon tour” of Beijing before heading to his province to finalize his adoption. (Which I recommend all adoptive parents do at least once, by the way. It’s a huge insight into your child’s birth culture.) Included somewhere in that two-day blur of sight-seeing, our group …Read More

clarity and experience

February 1, 2013 heart defect, Kam 4 Comments

The entry below is an excerpt from a post I wrote last year in June for NHBO. We had received what seemed to be devastating news about our son in Henan and after processing it for a few weeks, I thought my writing it may be a help to some adoptive parents. But within an …Read More

Questions and No Answers

January 5, 2013 heart defect, Tara 8 Comments

I am excited to introduce our newest member of the No Hands But Ours team, Tara. Tara is a Texas gal who’s passionate about God and adoption. She has been married to the man of her dreams for 13 years and they have five children: three “homegrown” kids, a son with cleft lip and palate …Read More

sleep deprived & living to tell about it

January 1, 2013 heart defect, Kam 3 Comments

It’s funny just how fast we forget the hard stuff. Like labor and delivery. Or training for an athletic goal. Or the first few weeks of full on reentry after an international adoption. We were blessed with two daughters by birth. After the first traumatic delivery, for a solid 18 months, I said “never again!” …Read More

Advent

December 1, 2012 heart defect, Kam 1 Comments

I’ve been pondering Christmas a lot lately. It’s December, after all, and well… it’s just been on my mind. The season of Advent… or the coming of the Lord. How long God’s people waited for it. Imagined it. Prepared for it. Prayed and asked and begged for it. For the Advent. It’s running through my …Read More

peeling back the layers

November 1, 2012 heart defect, Kam 0 Comments

So I’ve been MIA from here for about two months and for good reason… we went to China! And can I just say? It was absolutely amazing. We enjoyed every minute of our trip. Receiving our son, Gabe, was all that we hoped and prayed it would be. When we met our first son in …Read More

Between a Fork and a Chopstick

October 5, 2012 heart defect, older child adoption, Sonia 21 Comments

That’s where I find myself. Between a fork and a chopstick. And that’s where I come to you today asking for some momma advice. I love the way these boys eat. ok in truth….I could do without the slurping…..gag but other than that I have no problem with it. But here’s where I am stuck… …Read More

Keeping the Past in the Present

September 27, 2012 heart defect, older child adoption, Wife of the Prez 5 Comments

“It is kind of almost like a pseudo-open adoption,” the adoption professional said to me as I shared with her about our reunion with our 12-year-old son’s foster family. Absence may not have made their hearts grow stronger—I don’t think the love could be much stronger than it already was—but absence definitely made the hearts …Read More

The Myth of the "New Normal"

September 3, 2012 heart defect, older child adoption, Sonia 28 Comments

That’s what it feels like to me. A myth. “New” normal? Normal? Whaaa? I’m completely unfamiliar with that word at the moment. The feeling of being normal is elusive to me. Does “the new normal” really even exist? I wonder this because I cannot, for the life of me, find it. Nothing about our life …Read More

The Surgery That Wasn't

August 27, 2012 cl/cp, heart defect, older child adoption, Wife of the Prez 2 Comments

At 1:45 p.m. Tuesday, August 21, I was preparing trying to prepare for surgery #14, which was scheduled for the following day, Wednesday, August 22. Yes, that is not a typo. Fourteen surgeries since we brought Li’l Miss home and waited during her six-hour, open-heart surgery on September 30, 2008. Tomorrow was to be the …Read More

730 Days

August 13, 2012 heart defect, Laine 8 Comments

“Stick ’em up, heart cath…” Kevin joined our family in February 2010 with pulmonary hypertension, single ventricle, heterotaxy, VSD, and a few other heart anomalies. Before we brought Kevin home, we knew there was a possibility that he would not be a candidate for a heart repair surgery. Just a few weeks after arriving home, …Read More

He Didn't Get the Memo

August 3, 2012 heart defect, older child adoption, Sonia 17 Comments

Have you ever seen the TV show Parenthood? I have. I like that show. Nay. I like-like that show. I love watching family dynamics play out in front of me that I don’t have to stress about or worry over or problem solve It’s a bit like how I learned to be a parent by …Read More

t-minus very soon

August 1, 2012 heart defect, Kam 7 Comments

I typically have a pretty good idea where I’m going with a post here. I mean, it’s only once a month, right? How hard can it be? My slot is usually the first day of each month. So by the week before it’s due, I’ve at least got a jumping-off point. But this time is …Read More

The Bed

July 13, 2012 cl/cp, heart defect, Laine, radial club hand 3 Comments

I love my bed, don’t you love your bed? Think about it for a minute. When you’ve been out of town for awhile, don’t you just look forward to your OWN BED? There’s just nothing else like it. And oh, that first night back in your bed after you’ve been away on a trip? You …Read More

When Enough is Enough

July 3, 2012 heart defect, large families, older child adoption, orphanage realities, Realities, should we adopt?, Sonia 104 Comments

I’m confused. I’m heartbroken. I’m left feeling selfish. And in a perpetual state of prayer and wonder. I remember when John and I were discussing Joshua’s adoption and John felt like Joshua needed to be the last one and I completely agreed. We had been home only 3 months with Jacob and Joey and we …Read More

A Birthday Fully Enjoyed

June 13, 2012 cl/cp, heart defect, Laine, radial club hand 5 Comments

I remember 5 years ago on May 26th, 2007. I was at my niece’s graduation camping experience with my entire family. We were having the time of our lives. Biking, hiking, roasting marshmallows, swimming, talking, sharing…it was a wonderful day! Except for that deep void I felt in my heart. That sadness that made me …Read More

Recalculate

June 3, 2012 heart defect, older child adoption, Sonia 14 Comments

When you go on your adoption trip expect it expect to meet Jesus there. I did. And then I walked right past Him. A year and a half later and I am still haunted by my choice. A year and a half ago we had gone to a park one day, you know the one …Read More

Some Things You Just Can’t Get Over

May 27, 2012 cl/cp, heart defect, older child adoption, Wife of the Prez 1 Comments

My post is late. My brain feels like mush much of the time. Life is just plain hard right now. For many reasons. I have really struggled with this post. Even going back and forth on a possible topic. I thought it was going to be about foster care. Then attachment. Then our new normal …Read More

letting go

May 1, 2012 heart defect, Kam 4 Comments

So many aspects of the adoption process can cause you grief. The paperwork, the money, the general worry about your little one. I think there is a false sense of security in the paper chase. Something, somewhere down deep tells you that you’ve got this thing under control. You order birth certificates and schedule home …Read More

Thankful We Didn't Know…

April 15, 2012 Diana, heart defect, tethered cord 3 Comments

When we reviewed the file of Emme Jade we knew she had a minor heart defect. She had already had a repair in Shanghai at 10 months old, and our cardiologist was confident her heart looked great! Fast forward to August, 8th, 2011 when we met Emme in Nanjing. There is only one word for …Read More

At nine months

April 11, 2012 heart defect, Kristi 4 Comments

Back in July I wrote about sleep (or lack thereof) in our house with our new addition. It seemed pretty dismal back then. For those in the midst of sleepless nights, I thought that a look at the light at the end of the tunnel may offer some encouragement. Sleep.  Such a precious commodity. I …Read More

The Terminal Child

March 6, 2012 heart defect, Sonia, Tetralogy of Fallot 11 Comments

I still don’t really know how we got here. I still don’t understand why that label Terminal. Didn’t make me turn away from him. Somehow. Someway. I knew. He.Was.Ours. And the fact that he hadn’t been given much time left on this earth somehow didn’t frighten me. It made me sad, certainly. For him, for …Read More

I not be fraid~

February 1, 2012 heart defect, hypospadias, Kam, Urogenital System 0 Comments

Happy February everyone! I for one can’t believe how fast time is moving. I’m sure it’s about to slow to a snail’s pace for my family though as we have just submitted our LOI for a new son this week. The wait has officially begun again. 🙂 Many of you know that we lost our …Read More

CHD: Single Ventricle Heart (Probably more than you wanted to know!)

January 22, 2012 complex heart defect, heart defect, Wife of the Prez 18 Comments

I had a reader* (on my family blog) ask a question the other day that I figured some others may be wondering. I also think answering it could potentially help educate others about single ventricle heart disease, and education is POWER and could mean another child going from orphan to a son or daughter. So …Read More

brand spankin' new~

December 10, 2011 heart defect, Kam 0 Comments

I really can’t decide where to begin. Being new here fills me with a million questions. None of which really matter to anyone but me! Still, I don’t want this “Hello” post to be about me or us or our family. But I just think it could come across rude to just pop in like …Read More

Learning to love dangerously

October 11, 2011 heart defect, Kristi 0 Comments

Special needs. There’s a whole lot of weight to those two words. I’ve written a few times about how having several children with so called “special needs” doesn’t define our family.  We have more specialist appointments than some and less than others, but overall the family life of the “M6” is mapped by four active …Read More

His heart

July 11, 2011 adoption realities, heart defect, Kristi 0 Comments

I’ll never forget meeting our Daniel for the very first time.  We had met both Caleb and Darcy around the same age and while Ian and I were thrilled, it could be said that neither of them were…  I was prepared for a similar reaction from our youngest. As we approached the courtyard, the red …Read More

SN: CHD and CL/CP

April 27, 2011 cl/cp, heart defect, Wife of the Prez 0 Comments

I see this label often on the shared list and advocacy sites. It hits close to my heart to see it. I don’t think as I used to of the FEAR. Of the what ifs. Of genetic syndromes. Of shorter lifespans. Of lower intelligence. Of open-heart surgery. Of speech delays that may take years to …Read More

Lucas

February 21, 2011 Family Stories, heart defect, VSD 0 Comments

by Lyn, mom to Lucas from China with an SN of repaired VSD I was not one of those people who longed to adopt a child my whole life. My husband Bob and I had two biological girls and thought our family was complete. Adoption had never occurred to us until December 2005. That Christmas, …Read More

Adoption Reality #2: Special Needs Do NOT Define Children

August 30, 2010 adoption realities, heart defect, Wife of the Prez 0 Comments

This post is a bit of a detour for me from my original plan for my #2 Adoption Reality. I feel the need to share this though, and to add a disclaimer that these Adoption Realities I’m sharing are MY realities. They may not be the same for all of us, but for me this …Read More

Sara

April 14, 2010 Family Stories, heart defect, VSD 0 Comments

by Tricia, mom to Sara from China with an SN of congenital heart defect (VSD) My husband and I had a strong desire to grow our family via adoption and we were soon drawn to China’s program and the idea of adding a daughter to our family. We signed up with CCAI in 2007 and …Read More

Jadyn

March 1, 2010 heart defect, TGA, VSD 0 Comments

by Sue, mom to Jadyn from China with a SN of TGA, PS and VSD (major heart condition) Our SN check list included mild and/or a correctable heart condition. 35 months after our log-in-date we received a phone call from our agency about a little girl who had recently turned 2 and had a VSD. …Read More

Ella

June 3, 2009 CWA, Family Stories, heart defect, VSD 0 Comments

by Kelly, mom to Ella from China with a congenital heart defect The decision to pursue a “special needs” adoption when we were ready to bring home our second daughter, our fifth child, was an easy one for us to make. In fact, we never even considered ‘getting back in line’ for a NSN (non-special …Read More

Kaylin Mei Lian

April 10, 2009 Family Stories, heart defect, Tetralogy of Fallot 0 Comments

by Anita, momma to Kaylin Mei Lian from China with Tetralogy of Fallot (CHD) As we began the adoption of our daughter, Kaylin, we went into it like many families requesting a non-special needs child as young as possible from China. We had already been blessed with three older, biological children who were healthy, and …Read More

Tia

March 25, 2009 Family Stories, heart defect, VSD 0 Comments

by Ellie, mom to Tia from China with VSD If you would have told us 3 or 4 years ago that we would choose a special needs adoption I can guarantee you we would have said NO WAY! You see before we began our adoption journey we had two healthy biological children and had chosen …Read More

Ally and Alaina

March 6, 2009 Family Stories, heart defect, PDA, VSD 0 Comments

by Lucy, mom to Ally and Alaina from China with heart defects We began our adoption process like most families – waiting for a NSN “healthy” child. We never even considered ANY SN at the beginning. Early in our “wait” I began looking at children on the Waiting Child list, but was always scared away …Read More

Mya Jian

March 4, 2009 ASD, CCAI, Family Stories, heart defect, VSD 0 Comments

by Sara, mom to Mya Jian from China with ASD & VSD “Without it she wouldn’t be ours.” Her scar. Her badge of survival and hope. The 6″ line that runs the length of her chest. It’s unevenness & healed broken rib, a forever reminder. Without it, she wouldn’t be ours. I dreamed about a …Read More

Abby Grace

February 2, 2009 AWAA, cl/cp, Family Stories, heart defect 0 Comments

By Jennifer, mother to Abby Grace from China with complex unrepaired heart condition and unrepaired bi-lateral cleft lip and palate In December of 2005 a little girl was born in the city of Ping Liang in GanSu Province China. A child that was not perfect in the eyes of man but perfect in the eyes …Read More

Susannah

January 30, 2009 AWAA, cl/cp, Family Stories, heart defect 0 Comments

by Leslie, mother to Susannah from China with complex unrepaired heart defects and unrepaired cl/cp Our journey to Susannah began years ago as God was birthing the desire to adopt in both of our hearts. It is very hard to pinpoint a specific date as I can look back at so many moments when I …Read More

Fei Yan

December 10, 2008 Family Stories, heart defect, HepB+ 0 Comments

By anonymous, mom to Fei Yan from China with a heart defect (VSD) and Hep B+ When we began the adoption process we were pursuing a healthy child. God had other plans and soon opened our hearts to the children on the waiting child list. We filled out a form with our agency in April …Read More

Josie

November 24, 2008 Family Stories, heart defect, Tetralogy of Fallot 0 Comments

By Kim Kenward, mother to Josie from a China with a Congenital Heart Defect ~ Tetralogy of Fallot Our Journey to Josephine Xue Kenward When we first started out in the adoption process, we didn’t start out pursuing a special needs adoption. On July 31, 2007, we found our daughter on a waiting child list …Read More

Cana

October 20, 2008 Family Stories, heart defect 0 Comments

by Stacy, mom to Cana from China with Ventricular Septal Defect The Miracle of Cana ~May 15, 2007 – WONDERFUL and DEVASTATING NEWS!!! 2 weeks since referral… The wonderful news is that we received a medical update on our little Cana (see below entry). God has healed her heart!!! Although there are still some medical …Read More

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