730 Days

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“Stick ‘em up, heart cath…” Kevin joined our family in February 2010 with pulmonary hypertension, single ventricle, heterotaxy, VSD, and a few other heart anomalies. Before we brought Kevin home, we knew there was a possibility that he would not be a candidate for a heart repair surgery. Just a few weeks after arriving home, […]

He Didn’t Get the Memo

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Have you ever seen the TV show Parenthood? I have. I like that show. Nay. I like-like that show. I love watching family dynamics play out in front of me that I don’t have to stress about or worry over or problem solve It’s a bit like how I learned to be a parent by […]

t-minus very soon

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I typically have a pretty good idea where I’m going with a post here. I mean, it’s only once a month, right? How hard can it be? My slot is usually the first day of each month. So by the week before it’s due, I’ve at least got a jumping-off point. But this time is […]

The Bed

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I love my bed, don’t you love your bed? Think about it for a minute. When you’ve been out of town for awhile, don’t you just look forward to your OWN BED? There’s just nothing else like it. And oh, that first night back in your bed after you’ve been away on a trip? You […]

When Enough is Enough

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I’m confused. I’m heartbroken. I’m left feeling selfish. And in a perpetual state of prayer and wonder. I remember when John and I were discussing Joshua’s adoption and John felt like Joshua needed to be the last one and I completely agreed. We had been home only 3 months with Jacob and Joey and we […]

A Birthday Fully Enjoyed

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I remember 5 years ago on May 26th, 2007. I was at my niece’s graduation camping experience with my entire family. We were having the time of our lives. Biking, hiking, roasting marshmallows, swimming, talking, sharing…it was a wonderful day! Except for that deep void I felt in my heart. That sadness that made me […]

Recalculate

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When you go on your adoption trip expect it expect to meet Jesus there. I did. And then I walked right past Him. A year and a half later and I am still haunted by my choice. A year and a half ago we had gone to a park one day, you know the one […]

Some Things You Just Can’t Get Over

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My post is late. My brain feels like mush much of the time. Life is just plain hard right now. For many reasons. I have really struggled with this post. Even going back and forth on a possible topic. I thought it was going to be about foster care. Then attachment. Then our new normal […]

letting go

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So many aspects of the adoption process can cause you grief. The paperwork, the money, the general worry about your little one. I think there is a false sense of security in the paper chase. Something, somewhere down deep tells you that you’ve got this thing under control. You order birth certificates and schedule home […]

Thankful We Didn’t Know…

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When we reviewed the file of Emme Jade we knew she had a minor heart defect. She had already had a repair in Shanghai at 10 months old, and our cardiologist was confident her heart looked great! Fast forward to August, 8th, 2011 when we met Emme in Nanjing. There is only one word for […]