Yes.

March 24, 2015 Rebecca 41 Comments

We say yes. 

We say yes to adoption. 
Not because we are

ready,
gutsy,
extra loving,
secure,
or financially capable.


unnamed


We say yes to adopting children with special needs. 
Not because we are
strong,
capable,
patient,
knowledgeable,
or prepared.

We say yes to adopting children with developmental delays.
Not because we are
competent,
gentle,
even tempered,
brave,
or undaunted.


yes1


We say yes to adopting medically complex children.
Not because we are
fearless,
equipped,
trained,
heroic,
or energetic.


Blog DSC_1714carnival


We say yes to adopting multiple children.
Not because we have

an extra bedroom,
a big house,
a jumbo van,
an unlimited bank account,
or parenting expertise.

We say yes to adopting older children. 
Not because we
are
qualified,
unafraid,
up to it,
secure,
or valiant.


yes4


We say yes to orphan ministry.
Not because we are

noble,
well planned,
efficient,
selfless,
or adequate.

We say yes to hosting orphans. 
Not because we

like stepping beyond our comfort zones,
have free time,
are adventurous,
or won’t be heartbroken at goodbye.

Rather, we say yes because we are expectant.  Though we tremble, we expect God to take our yeses, redeem the broken, and weave a great story. 

The truth is, we might possess a few of the characteristics that the world would deem worthy reasons to say yes to adoption, orphan ministry or orphan hosting.  But, for the most part, we know ourselves to be timid, weak, ill equipped, messy and wavering.  We waffle in our decision-making and fail in our parenting.  We have every reason to say no.   


yes3


But here is the glory part.  When we utter even the weakest yes, we find God to be big.  Bigger than we once thought.  Bigger than our lack.  Bigger than our doubt.  Bigger than the needs before us.  Bigger than we can comprehend.  Bigger.  And He proves Himself good, steady, intentional, on time, able, strong, and sovereign. 

So we take our small, mustard seed size faith, combine it with what we know to be true about God, and say yes.   

We say yes because the call is whispered, or downright shouted, into our hearts.
We say yes because we want a child.
We say yes because we have love to give.
We say yes because we prefer front row seats to God’s miracle work.
We say yes because we walk by faith, even when the future makes us quiver.


yes2


We’ll never feel adequate for the call.  The circumstances will never be quite right or the timing ideal.  But with hands open and palms up, we say yes anyway.  And another crib is emptied and new chapter written.


yes


So we say yes.  Yes to a lifetime of unqualified yeses.  Yes to moving forward in our smallness and God’s bigness.   

In a very real sense not one of us is qualified, but it seems that God
continually chooses the most unqualified to do his work, to bear his glory.
If we are qualified, we tend to think that we have done the job ourselves.
If we are forced to accept our evident lack of qualification, then there’s no
danger that we’ll confuse God’s work with our own, or God’s glory with our own.
Madeleine L’Engle, Walking on Water

 

 

 


 

*special thanks to Emily Flynt, Laura Kirkland, and Sharon Ankerich for sharing photos



41 responses to “Yes.”

  1. Terri says:

    Amen! Exactly the way we feel. Which is why we are adopting again. We are not equipped, but He is!!

  2. Guest says:

    This is lovely but it is also the stuff of disruption. Parents need to be educated before they say yes to a child. Nothing against the poster who has the most noble of intentions but I fear these yesses without the proper training.

    • Lara says:

      Amen! So often that’s what God wants….we aren’t qualified, but He always equips those He calls! 🙂

    • Knowing Rebecca and her heart (and considering all the other things she has written), I think that she would agree that parents need training and preparation. That’s a big part of why this blog exists! In my experience, though, sometimes the people who are most aware of all the ways something could go wrong — and really the most potentially equipped to walk through those challenges with commitment, perseverance, and hope — are also the people who struggle most greatly with saying YES simply because they know all the ways it could go wrong. And there is such a delicate balance between carefully and honestly assessing one’s abilities and saying no out of fear. I’m not sure any of us know exactly where that balance is, but we keep trying to walk it out with a lot of fear and trembling.

      • Rebecca says:

        Yes, Carrie. Yes, yes, yes! Lots of fear and trembling. Thank you, my wise friend. I think your comment is a blog post in itself.

    • Rebecca says:

      Thanks for the comment. Totally in agreement about the HUGE need for training. I’m so honored to contribute to NHBO, because I know the whole team believes strongly in informing and encouraging potential and existing adoptive families. Point taken. A note about getting training could have been included. I do believe fully though in everything stated here. So often we wait and wait for the perfect circumstances and to feel fully ready when we never will. In my mind and heart, first comes the YES, then comes the training, reading and asking questions. Before, after and in between though comes big faith in a God much more capable than we ever will be.

  3. Karmen Bernacchi says:

    Absolutely beautiful! Rebecca your words are always so well said. Thanks for sharing! I could not echo your sentiments more.

    • Rebecca says:

      Love you, Karmen. I appreciate you and how very thoughtful you are. So intentional about encouraging and it means a lot to me.

  4. Connie J says:

    Beautiful! You brought me to tears, Rebecca <3

  5. Jean says:

    Amazing post! Absolutely beautiful! Perfectly said!

  6. Teryia Sims says:

    Lovely. Your words and your heart and all the Beauty that Our Father is weaving into your family and your story. May He be lifted up and people drawn to Him through your precious family. ❤️❤️❤️

    • Rebecca says:

      Thank you, Teryia. Thanks so much for taking the time to comment. There is nothing more we’d like than to be used by Him. He’s the story weaver. Hope your family is well!

  7. FoodandtheFury says:

    As an adopted child, thanks for not blogging yet another self-righteous article painting us as little more than animals disguised as religiosity. You have a tough road ahead of you. But love always wins. Always. On this side of the resurrection or the other, always. Ultimately. Finally.

  8. Michelle McCormick says:

    LOVE!!! LOVE!!! LOVE!!!
    This Momma’s heart is overflowing with emotions on this one!!! The “messy beautiful” of the “YES”!!!
    God just asks us to trust and follow Him…we say “YES” and He shows up on time…evertime!!!
    Beautiful words from your heart, sweet friend…Beautiful!!!

    • Rebecca says:

      Yes, yes, Michelle. He shows up every single time in ways we can’t fathom. Thanks so very much for taking the time to encourage.

  9. Christine Weaver says:

    Rebecca, would you allow me to put this in a newsletter I publish for foster/adoptive families? Most of my subscribers do not have internet services. This piece resounds with the foster parents that I know and the international families too. raychris@dejazzd.com

  10. Jen says:

    I would like to borrow some of this post for a similar post on “why say yes to short term ministry”. May I use it but change the wording a bit as long as I credit you in the post?

  11. Terri says:

    I wish that I would have gotten the chance to say more than “Hello” with you at Chinese New Year. You are such an inspiration to me and I love following your story. This is awesome. Love the quote!

    • Rebecca says:

      Terri,
      Thanks so much for commenting. I am sorry we don’t go past “hello” too. I think I was running around chasing my small people! I really appreciate the encouragement. I love that quote too.

  12. Angie says:

    I love this post. We said yes 6 times knowing all the things you listed to be true. All the reasons we could have said no but we heard His heart calling our hearts and said yes. He warned us over and over to count the cost. Not the financial cost (we knew that was huge and a leap of faith) but the laying down of our lives was the cost and we found this paragraph that you wrote to be true:
    But here is the glory part. When we utter even the weakest yes, we find God to be big. Bigger than we once thought. Bigger than our lack. Bigger than our doubt. Bigger than the needs before us. Bigger than we can comprehend. Bigger. And He proves Himself good, steady, intentional, on time, able, strong, and sovereign.
    The key is He provides everything we need. When we began there was not all the information out there that there is now. Blogs were few and far between but He was our source of wisdom and there have been so many little things we felt led to do as we walked the healing process with our first few that we later read about and thought how Big is our God. All I know is I am sooo thankful we said yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!!!! I would not be who I am today and I would not have the blessing of knowing and being mama to these 6 amazing kids.

    • Rebecca says:

      6 blessings! It sounds like you have said some brave yeses! Love that, love the your story,and so appreciate your thoughtful response.

  13. Mary Winslow says:

    And that is precisely why we say, “YES”, too!

  14. Bethany says:

    This is SO what I needed to read right this moment. We are in the process of making some very difficult decisions on our adoption path, and this brought me to tears. Would you mind if I reposted on my blog?

    • Rebecca says:

      Thank you, Bethany. So sorry difficult decisions are before you. I’m glad you were encouraged in some small way. Please feel free to share. Thanks for asking.

  15. Kathy says:

    Love, love, love this! So much of this applies to fostering too–something I’ve said YES to. Thank you for sharing this!

  16. Kerri says:

    This is great! I have to ask, though – what part of the Great Wall were you at? That is a fantastic picture!

  17. Kari says:

    Thank you!!!! Loved your beautiful words….we just got done saying yes to the possibility of now adopting a sibling group of 3. I am sharing on our blog and hope others can too be encouraged.

  18. kelly says:

    YES! we said our first YES! this year. these words resonate. thank you for sharing their truth with us. bless you! beautiful YES! to what God is asking of His Family.

  19. Kris says:

    Going through a hard time with ours. Sobbed. Jist sobbed.

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