When we started our journey to China, we wanted to adopt a little girl. When we filled out our Medical Conditions Checklist, we specified girl only. I had visions of picking out a glorious name for my daughter-to-be, dressing her in the most beautiful clothes, and decorating her room. This baby girl would be my first child, and I even dreamed about her at night. It felt almost as if I knew her — down to what special need I thought she would have. I was convinced.
A few things happened shortly thereafter. I joined a bunch of China Adoption groups on Facebook. I began to read more, and I learned that the majority of adoptive families hope to adopt girls, and that the majority of waiting children are boys. Someone sent me a link to a Love Without Boundaries video called Adopting a Boy – and watching that video brought me to tears. I had a phone call with our adoption agency at the time, and our case worker asked me to consider whether we would be open to adopting a little boy. She told me that if we wanted to adopt a young girl with minor needs, we would be facing a lengthy wait time, while they had several little boys listed who were waiting to be placed with families.
I remember telling my husband about the need for families who were interested in adopting little boys. To be completely honest, this information pretty much blew our minds. What little we knew about China adoption consisted of the stories of a few family friends who had brought home healthy baby girls prior to the advent of the Special Needs program.
Learning that there were so many boys who wait for families caused us to enter an immediate period of soul searching. I have to tell you that I think this soul searching may have lasted at most a day, because what we quickly realized was that, for our family, waiting months or years to adopt a girl would be completely about us, and completely not about our new child. We didn’t have other children to consider, or really anything to consider at all. What made sense to us was to bring home a child who really needed us, a child who had been waiting, and one who might have been overlooked by other families.
And then I saw this face.
And it was all over. He’s been home for a year, and I think it’s safe to say that adopting a little boy was the best decision we’ve ever made. I don’t want to delve too deeply into gender stereotyping right now, but I will do it anyway, despite my reservations. This little guy is ALL boy, all the time.
He loves bubbles…
He loves astronauts…
He loves choo choos… And busses…
And anything with a siren… (He calls police, fire, and EMTs helpers, and he loves all of you helpers out there.)
He loves to build things, and he loves to tear things apart. He loves to follow his Baba around the house and help him fix things and put things away. He loves cars, and boats, and trucks, and vans, and anything noisy, and anything fast.
He also loves having a family. We are so very lucky that we get to be his mama and baba.
So, here’s the thing. You guys will do your research. You’ll read a lot on NHBO this month about the statistics regarding waiting children. You’ll hear from lots of boy moms, and we will all tell you that raising boys is amazing — because it really is. And you’ll know. At the end of the day, some of you will read these posts, and know that you still want to adopt a little girl. That’s wonderful. There are many girls in China who need families.
But for the rest of you mamas out there, for the mamas who started out this journey like I did — a little less aware, and not too sure one way or the other — I’m talking to you right now. Here are the faces of some of China’s waiting boys.
My hope is that these precious faces might open your hearts and minds to the possibility that a little boy might just be the perfect fit for your family. My hope is that one of these little guy’s mamas might just read this post today.
This is Caleb.
This is Michael.
This is Nathan.
This is Jonathan.
This is Miles.
This is Tucker.
This is Josiah.
This is Waylon.
These boys are all listed with our adoption agency — AAC Adoption and Family Network, Inc. Their files are classified as Special Focus. This means that you can seek to adopt them even if you haven’t done a bit of paperwork yet.
If you have any questions, please contact AAC’s Waiting Child Specialist, Nicole Brown by email at Nicole@aacadoption.com or by phone at 970-775-4683.