When Attachment Is Not What You Expected

August 30, 2018 Andrea Y., Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, July 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, parent-to-child attachment 5 Comments

Send. I remember exhaling after I completed his five year home post-placement report and sent it to our adoption agency. Five years — and the last of seven post adoption reports – was done. Barely in time… because you know how life gets. You get the reminder it is due and suddenly you find yourself …Read More

Attachment Through the Years: 7 Years Home

August 29, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, Contributor Q and A, July 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, Nicole, parent-to-child attachment, Trust Based Parenting 0 Comments

Attachment. It’s a word that, at some point of the adoption journey, will bring every parent to their knees – either in frustration over all that seems to be lacking or gratitude for heart-shaped milestones reached. This month we are focusing on attachment over the long(er) term… not weeks or months home. But years down …Read More

Waiting to be Chosen: Violet

August 28, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Violet is an adorable little girl who turned three in March. She is walking and talking and seems to woo the hearts of all of her nannies and guests – she likes to greet people and everyone likes her. She likes people to take her hand and she sings “Little Swallow” while walking. She has …Read More

The Beautiful Hard Work of Bonding

August 27, 2018 adopting later in life, adopting out of birth order, Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, baby-wearing, large families, Lifelong needs, Linny, older child adoption, rejects mom 2 Comments

Growing up in the 1960s the only adoptions I had heard of were people who attempted to “match” their own ethnicity with that of a potential adoptive child. I knew of no one who had adopted internationally. Yet for some reason the only desire in my little-girl-go-against-the-flow heart was to one day adopt from both …Read More

Happy Five Years To Our Shining Light

August 25, 2018 A Life Donated, advanced heart failure, Andrea O., complex heart defect, end stage cardiac disease, heart transplant 0 Comments

August 21st marked five years since Rini Ann Yongling became our daughter. We had spent the previous three days in the shadowlands while our agency’s staff, both stateside and in China, worked feverishly on our behalf. The “begging letter”, as I named it, which I had been given an hour to compose the night after …Read More

Urgent Waiting Child: Elizabeth

August 24, 2018 Children Who Wait 3 Comments

Beautiful Elizabeth is three years old and was born with a very complex heart condition. At 18 months she had surgery – a Bidirectional Glenn. She is adorable, very smart and has a strong, confident personality. Her file even says she will stand up for injustice for her weaker brothers and sisters. This little gal …Read More

The Dance

August 23, 2018 adopting out of birth order, Central Nervous System, clubfoot, Family Stories, mobility issues, older child adoption, Orthopedic, scoliosis, spina bifida, virtual twins, wheelchair user 5 Comments

I’ll never forget the morning I found my daughter Ava and son Daniel huddled around the family computer. The screen was blocked by their two heads… “Whatcha doin’?” I inquired. They both turned around to reveal a waiting child adoption site that they had been scrolling through. “Mom, look at this little girl… isn’t she …Read More

Meet Theo!

August 22, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Theo is an adorable baby boy, born in August of 2015, who has the most kissable cheeks! He has been under the care of a Show Hope wing in his orphanage. He is close with his caretakers and gets along well with others. He can play with the other children. Theo is sensitive to sound …Read More

Attachment Through the Years: Choosing to Love

August 21, 2018 adopting again, Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, parent-to-child attachment 0 Comments

In the middle of August in West Virginia the weather is hot, steamy, and muggy. The mosquitoes have been bad this year, but stepping outside in the heat reminds me of Guangzhou. This beautiful, tropical city is the third largest in China. It was China’s capital three previous times and today is a strategic port …Read More

It’s a Marathon, Not a Sprint

August 19, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, Megan V., parent-to-child attachment 0 Comments

I thought bonding would be so natural. When I became a mom, they laid that freshly born boy in my arms and it was magic. The love had been growing for nine months. As sinews and tendons were knitted together to become our son, my heart was expanding to make room for the love that …Read More

Find My Family: Fynn

August 18, 2018 Children Who Wait 1 Comments

Fynn was born in April of 2015 and is well liked by all of his nannies. Fynn’s caretakers describe him as a little quiet and introverted, but also said that he likes playing with other children. His favorite toys are cars and toy blocks. Fynn was diagnosed with an umbilical hernia. His nannies believe he …Read More

Answers in a Pink Backpack

August 17, 2018 birth family, birth family search, Carrie, Chinese Culture, heritage trip, orphanage, Post-Adoption contact, telling their life story 1 Comments

It’s a strange thing, this not having answers about the beginning. A mother is supposed to know the story of the day her daughter was born and the first days of her life. It’s the natural order of things. And the questions have stacked up in my mind these last few years… Was she left …Read More

“Nobody Wanted Me” – 
Three Reasons I Paused Before Responding

August 15, 2018 Rebecca, telling their life story 2 Comments

She said it freely, just a fleeting thought. She wasn’t teary or red faced. She had her dolls joy riding in a convertible Corvette and was simply talking while playing. I was fluttering around tasking, putting cups in the dishwasher and considering pulling chicken out of the freezer. She had been chatting all morning, and …Read More

Waiting to be Chosen: Quinton

August 13, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Quinton is a precious little boy, born in July of 2016, who is described as fairly quiet. He rarely cries, unless he’s reaching for a cuddle and doesn’t get it! Caregivers say he has a gentle personality and that he will stamp his feet in joy while playing. Quinton is under the care of a …Read More

A Grand Canyon Kind Of Beauty

August 11, 2018 attachment activities, attachment challenges, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, first year home, indiscriminate affection, Newly Home, Whitney 0 Comments

My family road-tripped last summer and one of the places we stopped off at was the Grand Canyon. Visiting this place has been on my bucket list for basically my whole life, and to finally see it in person was stunning. Words fail to describe the depth, the colors, the beauty or the sheer big-ness …Read More

Meet Zayden!

August 10, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Zayden is an adorable and happy little boy, born in July of 2016, who laughs and smiles often. He’s been a nanny favorite since he was a baby and it’s clear to see why! An MRI from June of 2017 showed that Zayden’s corpus callosum did not develop and that he had hydrocephalus. At four …Read More

Attachment Through the Years: Unique For All

August 9, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, baby-wearing, co-sleeping, parent-to-child attachment 4 Comments

Attachment and parenting go hand in hand. Right? When we consider parents and their children, we assume there is an attachment. In reality, attachment looks and develops differently for all. And attachment in adoption can be an entirely different notion. I have three biological children and I would be lying if I told you I …Read More

Waiting For You: Liv

August 8, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Liv is full of personality and you can’t help but fall in love with her just by looking at her sweet face! Liv was born in June of 2014, but didn’t come into care until she was about two years old. She arrived with medical reports showing that she had surgeries in 2015 for hydrocephalus …Read More

Healing in the Everyday

August 7, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, homeschool, July 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, large families, life books, parent-to-child attachment, Sharon, telling their life story 0 Comments

“The days are long, but the years are short.” Gretchen Rubin had an epiphany one rainy afternoon in the unlikeliest of places: a city bus. “The days are long, but the years are short,” she realized. “Time is passing, and I’m not focusing enough on the things that really matter.” In that moment, she decided …Read More

Attachment Through the Years: What I Wish I Had Known

August 5, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, first year home, Newly Home, parent-to-child attachment 6 Comments

No one said this would be easy… and it isn’t. For our family, attachment has happened, is happening and will continue to happen. The Lord is showing us how to love without expectation, regardless of feelings and it is not easy. It is blessed but it is not easy. However, in the fluidity of attachment, …Read More

Zeke and His Adorable Cheeks!

August 4, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Zeke is an active, gentle, and adorable little boy, with the sweetest of cheeks! Born in October of 2016, he has been diagnosed with malformation of all four limbs. It appears Zeke really has Apert Syndrome. When being examined, Zeke was given an ECHO, which showed ASD, a little back flow of TV, and normal …Read More

Overlooking the Checklist: Saying Yes to OI

August 3, 2018 Family Stories, June 2018 Feature - Orthopedic, large families, medical needs checklist, Orthopedic, osteogenesis imperfecta, pre-adoption, wheelchair user 2 Comments

Very quickly after beginning of our adoption process we were asked to fill out a Medical Needs Checklist… a checklist of medical conditions commonly seen in China’s orphans. You must go down the checklist and check “yes”, “no” or “willing to discuss” about adopting a child with the listed condition. Nothing makes you feel more …Read More

Find My Family: Cora

August 2, 2018 Children Who Wait 0 Comments

Cora is a beautiful little girl, born in March of 2016, who loves to be held and cuddled. She always smiles and babbles at her caregiver while she is holding her. Cora is happiest when she is sitting in the rocking chair or standing in her walker outside. Her caregivers say she is shy and …Read More

Attachment Through the Years: Embracing the Adventure

August 1, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, August 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years 1 Comments

The dining hall was buzzing with campers, counselors, and parents. At first, I couldn’t locate my daughter in the crowd, but I continued moving toward the spot in which I expected to find her. I was feeling hopeful, since everyone I had encountered since parking my van in the camp parking lot had recognized my …Read More

© 2018 No Hands But Ours

The content found on the No Hands But Ours website is not approved, endorsed, curated or edited by medical professionals. Consult a doctor with expertise in the special needs of interest to you.