April 22, 2019 pre-adoption, Rebecca, should we adopt? 2 Comments

“Don’t wait for more revelation; be obedient to the amount of revelation God has given you.” – Mark Batterson, Draw the Circle I remember hunkering in my hiding spot as a child, my heart beating wildly. Whichever friend was “it” in our game of hide and seek would be counting to ten, just seconds away …Read More

March 14, 2019 China trip, Gotcha Day, March 2019 Feature - In China, prepping for China, Rebecca, travel tips, What To Expect 4 Comments

Dear Soon to Travel Adoptive Family, If I could go back now, these are the words that I’d whisper to my own pre-trip heart. My hope is that they’ll fall gently, offer a bucket of grace, excite your spirit, and speak to your heart. Before our first adoption trip, I was giddy with joy and …Read More

January 21, 2019 adoption community, first year home, local adoption support, local church, Newly Home, Rebecca 0 Comments

Do you have friends who are a newly adoptive family and want to show them some love? (If they are still in the paperwork process, start here.) Every family is unique, but one thing is certain: they needed you while they were in process and they need you now. Their knees are wobbly because the …Read More

September 24, 2018 adoption realities, Realities, Rebecca 2 Comments

With a pen flurry, I signed our agency application casting myself in the role of child savior. Somewhere in my well-meant thinking, it began my heroic walk to the barn of good deeds, where I grabbed my saddle. The time had come for my husband and me to mount our white horses, heading out on …Read More

August 15, 2018 Rebecca, telling their life story 2 Comments

She said it freely, just a fleeting thought. She wasn’t teary or red faced. She had her dolls joy riding in a convertible Corvette and was simply talking while playing. I was fluttering around tasking, putting cups in the dishwasher and considering pulling chicken out of the freezer. She had been chatting all morning, and …Read More

July 29, 2018 adopting two at once, Attachment, attachment activities, attachment challenges, July 2018 Feature - Attachment Through the Years, Medical Momma, Newly Home, Rebecca 2 Comments

Attachment. It’s a word that, at some point of the adoption journey, will bring every parent to their knees – either in frustration over all that seems to be lacking or gratitude for heart-shaped milestones reached. This month we are focusing on attachment over the long(er) term… not weeks or months home. But years down …Read More

May 23, 2018 adoption community, local adoption support, other ways to care for the orphan, Rebecca 0 Comments

1. Prayer. It is our most powerful weapon, so let’s use it. Regularly ask, “How can I pray for you today?” Snap a photo of the family’s name on your prayer list. Remember to let them know, “Our family prayed for you last night.” Have kids make cards promising to pray. Best, invite the family …Read More

February 23, 2018 Attachment, attachment activities, Rebecca 1 Comments

Sometimes I just can’t get much right as a parent. 
Sometimes my words fail.
 Sometimes my methods don’t work.
 Sometimes my bag of tricks is empty. 
 Sometimes I am high on frustration and low on forgiveness. 
 Sometimes my kids are grumpy, and I move to the opposite end of the house. 
Sometimes trauma …Read More

January 17, 2018 adoption community, adoption realities, Rebecca 2 Comments

You stepped up boldly in faith to adopt, so I am going to venture to say that you are strong. Probably brave too, though you might not feel it. You most likely hold it all together for a whole band of people. But, I also know that adoption is a long haul. A journey that …Read More

December 23, 2017 Rebecca 12 Comments

Dear Lord, You did it. You really did. You gave us what we prayed for. We asked, and you answered with the adoption of three Chinese children. A glorious gift. Remember all those lifted prayers? Oh, how we prayed, and prayed, and prayed for our kids. We prayed, our friends prayed and our families prayed. …Read More

November 16, 2017 China trip, first weeks home, Gotcha Day, Newly Home, November 2017 Feature - Preparing for Adoption, Rebecca 6 Comments

When You Adopt, Expect… Your knees to be rubbed raw from time knelt in prayer. That every step of the way, God has something to say, if you’ll only still yourself to listen. That if He is asking you to wait, it is intentional. That your adoption story will be completely unique from everyone else’s, …Read More

October 18, 2017 Rebecca 0 Comments

You belong, my child. 
You are loved.
 You are seen.
 You are prayed for. 
You are included. 
You are a gift. 
 You are a member of this family.
 You are unique and special, yet melted into our whole. … You belong, my child. Our last name is yours.
 Our home is yours. 
Our food …Read More

September 20, 2017 adoption community, books, Chinese Culture, Rebecca 4 Comments

I pulled at the corners of my eyes, slanting them until all I could see was light and distorted faces. Then, I strung together a long chain of “Chinese-Japanese” words, “Ching, ching, chong, chang, chong.” It got me some laughs. Other kids did it too, so I guessed it was no big thing. I was …Read More

July 20, 2017 adoption realities, orphanage realities, Realities, Rebecca 3 Comments

“We must learn to realize that the love of God seeks us in every situation, and seeks our good.” 
- Thomas Merton Sometimes things just don’t make a bit of sense. 
 Sometimes, often actually, God allows things to happen that I don’t get.
 Sometimes, in the story, rules change, and I’m confused.
 Sometimes, in …Read More

April 28, 2017 April 2017 Feature - Love Stories, Gotcha Day, orphanage visit, Rebecca 5 Comments

Dear Nanny, As soon as we walked away from our wildly brief time with you, I began to realize what I’d missed, what I’d failed to do. I didn’t say thank you as I wanted to. I saw you, spoke to you, took photos with you, but I know I didn’t truly look into your …Read More

March 23, 2017 adoption realities, Rebecca 2 Comments

I am thankful for my family. I’m thankful that we’re all safe 
and there’s no one in the world that I’d rather be too hot or too cold with. – Jack Pearson, This is Us Time’s been storytelling with us. Our family life is a sitcom and a drama. Our script has been sweet and …Read More

February 28, 2017 February 2017 Feature - Preparing Your Child for Medical Interventions, hospital stays, Medical Momma, Rebecca 0 Comments

Special needs don’t always equal medical needs. But sometimes they do. Many of our children require therapies, treatments, hospitalizations or surgical procedures. These can be potentially anxiety-producing for any child, but significantly more so for a child with trauma in their past. So, this month we are focusing on Medical Interventions and how you can …Read More

February 4, 2017 February 2017 Feature - Preparing Your Child for Medical Interventions, hospital stays, Medical Momma, Rebecca, surgery 4 Comments

Special needs don’t always equal medical needs. But sometimes they do. Many of our children require therapies, treatments, hospitalizations or surgical procedures. These can be potentially anxiety-producing for any child, but significantly more so for a child with trauma in their past. So, this month we are focusing on Medical Interventions and how you can …Read More

January 28, 2017 Attachment, Rebecca 3 Comments

My sweet one, you and I might not share DNA, but I am forever and always, biologically yours. Biology: the science of life or living matter in all its forms and phenomena, 
especially with reference to origin, growth, reproduction, structure, and behavior.
 Dictionary.com /// If you researched our story, you’d begin with the origin of …Read More

December 23, 2016 Rebecca 1 Comments

There are the rare and beautiful treasures
 That grow when it’s coldest 
When nobody’s watching 
~ Christy Nockels, Amaryllis God likes to whisper hope to me through song lyrics. He gifts me with hummable love letters. Ones that I can play again and again to help convince myself of truth. In this colder season of …Read More

November 23, 2016 books, LWB, NGOs, other ways to care for the orphan, Rebecca 0 Comments

“Walking into my daughter’s orphanage for the first time changed everything
 I thought I knew about my life.” 
- Amy Eldridge Do you have anybody you’d like to sit across a table from? I’m guessing you have a list of folks. As for me, I’d designate one of my chairs to Amy Eldridge, founder of …Read More

November 3, 2016 Rebecca 16 Comments

You, my child, were adopted. You have a birth family. You have a forever family. You have two, both very real, lines of genealogy. You have two countries to call home. /// You were designed on purpose, long before your birth, by a loving Creator. Your name has been written in the palm of His …Read More

August 27, 2016 Meet the Contributors, Rebecca 1 Comments

Continuing today with our series in which we share a short Q and A with one of our contributors to give y’all, our faithful readers, a little more behind-the-scenes insight into the amazing group of writers assembled here. And it will also give each of our contributors a chance to share their heart in a …Read More

July 24, 2016 July 2016 Feature - Dear Younger Me, Rebecca 1 Comments

Dear Younger Me, You were wrong about many things, and I am oh so very glad you were. /// You got married and designed a life plan. It was a dreamy projection, and you believed you had control of how it all would go. You had a timeline, a number of kids in mind, visions …Read More

June 25, 2016 adoption community, Rebecca 7 Comments

Sometimes I can’t bear CNN. I can’t stomach Facebook. My heart can’t hold another story of gut-wrenching loss, more video of violence, another photo of a child swollen from hunger, yet more stories of families fleeing from hate in their homelands. I can’t read another word about ugly politics or strands of hateful, intolerant status …Read More

March 23, 2016 Rebecca, surgery 3 Comments

Dear Daughter, As I stood watching you, little one, tears rolled down my cheeks. You stood before my mirror all dolled up in your pink plastic dress-up shoes, hot pink, sparkly tutu, mismatched head bands, some bracelets, as many necklaces as you could gather, and your big sister’s glittery lip gloss. With your hip popped …Read More

February 23, 2016 February 2016 Feature - Siblings, Rebecca, sibling perspective, siblings 1 Comments

“It’s kind of weird being the only kid born in the USA.” She stopped me in my tracks. I was a trained adoptive parent. I read the books, took our agency’s assigned courses on transracial families, and attended conferences. I’d also read about preparing my biological daughter for the adoption of siblings. We purchased Asian …Read More

January 30, 2016 Rebecca 7 Comments

I could never do that. I could never adopt. I could never foster. I could never have more than two kids. I could never adopt multiple children. I could never afford adoption. I could never say yes to a child with special needs. I could never bear my child needing surgery. I could never parent …Read More

December 23, 2015 Christmas, Rebecca 1 Comments

Silent night, holy night, shepherds quake at the sight,
 Glories stream from heaven afar, heavenly hosts sing Alleluia.
 Christ the Saviour is born, Christ the Saviour is born.
 – Silent Night I don’t know if you know what Christmas is. Most likely not I assume. At least not the way we know it. I’m guessing …Read More

November 30, 2015 National Adoption Month, Orphan Sunday, protecting their story, Rebecca 2 Comments

How long must I wrestle with my thoughts…? – Psalm 13 Adoption awareness and orphan care have become a life’s work for us, a calling bigger than adding children to our family. It’s seeped into our faith, hearts, conversations, serving, friendships, and Instagram feeds. Though our first steps in were tentative, three adoptions later, we …Read More

October 31, 2015 birth family, October 2015 Feature - It Takes a Village, Rebecca 6 Comments

The village it’s taken to build our family is a wide circle. It took a village of family, friends, adoption agencies, social workers, US and Chinese government agencies, donors, an adoption support group, grant ministries and orphan advocates to get our three China babies home. It took a village of nannies, nurses, a healing home, …Read More

October 23, 2015 first weeks home, Medical Momma, October 2015 Feature - It Takes a Village, Rebecca, supporting adoptive families, surgery 2 Comments

“Let me know what I can do.” 

We make the offer to newly home adoptive families and families facing medical challenges or hospital stays. We all say it, and mean it, but we know they won’t take us up on. Not a matter of gratitude, help offers are always appreciated. And support is likely needed, …Read More

September 23, 2015 first weeks home, first year home, Medical Momma, Rebecca, September 2015 Feature - Coming Home, surgery 0 Comments

You are a newly home medical needs parent, and life might be feeling like triage. Your child needs to be catheterized, tube fed, dilated and medicated. They need therapy, glasses, wheelchairs, oxygen, blood transfusions, walkers, cochlear implants, casts, g-tubes and ostomy bags. They’ll need MRIs, IVs, ultrasounds, sleep studies, anesthesia, echocardiograms, X-rays, EEGs, CT scans, …Read More

September 13, 2015 Attachment, first weeks home, first year home, Rebecca, September 2015 Feature - Coming Home, siblings 1 Comments

When newly home two years ago with three year old, Eli, and one year old, Evelyn, life felt turned upside down for such a very long time. A few months in, I found myself focusing more heavily on the changes I was feeling and experiencing than on how my two little ones, who had been …Read More

July 31, 2015 China trip, July/August 2015 Feature - Going to China!, Rebecca 0 Comments

The China trip looms large in our adoptive parent hearts and minds. We daydream about Gotcha Day, pray for the moment we can snuggle in the hotel with our little love, hope for that once in a lifetime walk along the Great Wall, plan for an afternoon spent shopping in Guangzhou, and imagine ourselves eating …Read More

July 23, 2015 adopting two at once, adoption realities, China trip, Gotcha Day, July/August 2015 Feature - Going to China!, Rebecca 7 Comments

It’s the pinnacle of the adoption journey. We build a beautiful image of what gotcha day will be, and hold hard to that as we wait. Much preparation goes into readiness for caring for the child we’ve seen only in pictures. We study bonding techniques and possible reactions, and pack and repack little backpacks. But …Read More

June 27, 2015 hospital stays, Medical Momma, Rebecca, surgery 1 Comments

Ever learn something, quickly forget it, and need to be reminded again? During our daughter’s extensive surgery last November, God tapped into my medical momma’s fearful heart, comforting me with the revelation that I don’t have to be God of my children. It was a breakthrough parenting moment.  Little by little though, I again started mentally and …Read More

May 24, 2015 Rebecca 1 Comments

Taste and see that the LORD is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him.  Psalm 34:8 Sometimes I don’t like what God does.  Sometimes I can’t taste the sweetness, because of the hint of bitterness in the heart lesson. I don’t like when He calls me to something and then makes me wait.  …Read More

April 23, 2015 Rebecca 8 Comments

The surgeon walked out in his blue scrubs, mask still hanging around his neck, and found us awaiting word that the surgery was over.  The stitching, repairing, and testing was complete, and he offered  reassurance.  But, as we tend to do, we pressed.  What is the prognosis? How long is recovery? How much pain? Worst case scenario? When is …Read More

March 24, 2015 Rebecca 41 Comments

We say yes.  We say yes to adoption.  Not because we are ready, gutsy, extra loving, secure, or financially capable. We say yes to adopting children with special needs.  Not because we are strong, capable, patient, knowledgeable, or prepared. We say yes to adopting children with developmental delays. Not because we are competent, gentle, even …Read More

February 26, 2015 February 2015 Feature, February 2015 Feature - Marriage, marriage, Rebecca 5 Comments

You adopted a child with medical needs and the game changed. The Coach altered the playbook. The new little life in your family has your whole team scrambling to reorient themselves. You survived the stretching adoption process with its paperwork, lack of control, waiting and financial stress. You made it home, and you’d like to …Read More

January 23, 2015 adoption realities, chronic conditions, Rebecca 4 Comments

I am coming to terms with it.  This is not passing.  It’s not over after a surgery, or two.  Or after a therapy session, or three.  The first year is behind us, but there are more miles in this marathon.  I’m discovering what chronic means.  I’m learning that adopting a child labeled medically complex truly …Read More

December 24, 2014 Christmas, Rebecca 0 Comments

Mary and Joseph’s road to parenthood was out of the ordinary. Their path to family was different from that of their Nazarene neighbors. God’s request of them was heaven sized, yet as simple as parenting a child. They were asked to make space in their lives, in their hearts, and in Mary’ s womb, for …Read More

December 15, 2014 Rebecca, Stefanie, the little light project 0 Comments

A few weeks ago we asked for your help. We launched the little light project, with a desire to illuminate organizations that are working on behalf of the fatherless in China. We were thrilled with the response. So many hard-working, orphan-loving organizations that are – day-in and day-out – loving the least of these. Please …Read More

November 24, 2014 adoption realities, Rebecca 2 Comments

One year ago, we were somewhere over the ocean between East and West, with our two newly adopted, Mandarin speaking children. We were a muddled mix of joy, weariness, readiness to be home, heaviness from leaving our children’s birth country, and profound gratitude for our intensely beautiful time in China. Feeling the joy of long …Read More

October 23, 2014 orphan prevention, Rebecca 9 Comments

There is unity among adoptive families, a connection of experience, passion and heart. Becoming a card carrying member of this big, powerhouse club takes tears, bravery, faith, paperwork and prayer. We’ve paid our dues and call ourselves blessed to stand shoulder to shoulder, unified in many ways. Unified in celebrating adoption. Unified in raising funds …Read More

September 24, 2014 adoption realities, Rebecca 16 Comments

We adoptive parents are a feisty, powerful bunch. We are in pursuit…on mission…active…hoping…
dossier building…finger-printing…connecting….fundraising…hurdle jumping…praying…planning…
counting-down…conferencing…reading…packing…travelling…bonding…adjusting…teaching…nursing… care giving…loving. But are we listening for God’s voice? Many claim that adoption starts with a calling. God speaks and we respond. And for a glorious moment, our ears are perfectly tuned to His voice. Sometimes though, somewhere along the …Read More

August 23, 2014 Rebecca 11 Comments

It takes an earthquake to remind us that we walk on the crust 
of an unfinished earth. ~ Charles Kuralt At some point in my heart, you became just our little girl. You moved from orphan with a file, to a longed for daughter, to newly adopted, to just a loved girl with an incredible, …Read More

July 23, 2014 Rebecca 3 Comments

Childhood in summer. Unique for each kid, but much the same. It’s giggles, all day PJs, Crocs and popsicles. Children meeting, then heading out into the sunshine hand in hand as easy friends. The sun offers a special freedom. One of our recent summer days had notable stats: 1 water park, 4 mommas, 18 kids, …Read More

June 23, 2014 Rebecca 8 Comments

Before there was a picture, my heart held an image of you. I penned my name on the adoption application, and your life was written into my heart. “Whatever it takes”, took on new meaning. The forms, the hoop jumping, the check writing, the calls, the fingerprints, the background check, the study of our home, …Read More