by Sara, mom to Mya Jian from China with ASD & VSD
“Without it she wouldn’t be ours.”
Her scar. Her badge of survival and hope. The 6″ line that runs the length of her chest. It’s unevenness & healed broken rib, a forever reminder. Without it, she wouldn’t be ours.
I dreamed about a baby. A baby with dark brown hair & brown eyes, that had rosy cheeks and would laugh when I picked her up. A healthy baby. A baby that would eat cheerios and needed her diaper changed. A baby that needed me.
We began our adoption paperwork in October 2006, with this is mind. We were LID in April 2007 and by September, we had filled out the medical conditions checklist asking to be considered for a special needs child. We were always open to special needs, but we still wanted that baby! We weren’t open to any older than a 2 year old for the next 6 months or so – when God began to work on my heart.
Early summer 2008 we changed our medical conditions checklist to be open to a child older than 2. As God’s sweet providence is often displayed, in July 2008, we received the call for a little girl who was 2.5 with repaired ASD and VSD.
I was fearful of her heart condition, her age. I was fearful of what the doctors told me about the size of the hole in her heart. I was fearful if I stepped out of the boat, I would fall.
But we felt God whisper to us, “I know her. She is yours.”
Jeremiah 1:5 “Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born, I set you apart….”
We quickly accepted the referral of a little girl who we prayerfully hoped was “as healthy as possible” and read every thing we could about toddler adoption & attachment and bonding & researched the potential medical conditions she could have as a result of having lived so long with a large hole in her heart.
After being home with our new three old for almost 6 weeks, I couldn’t see it any other way. Our laughing, chatting, potty trained toddler is a dream come true. Her growth is amazing, and she is very healthy. She is full of zest & life and happiness! I am so thankful that God opened our hearts to a toddler, especially a special needs toddler. After all, her greatest special need was she needed a Mama and a Baba.
Sometimes God calls us to reach beyond comfortable for something extraordinary. Something that will leave us forever changed. Something that will make us more like Him. It seems strange to be thankful that our daughter was born sick. It feels overwhelming to praise Our Heavenly Father for her heart condition. But without it, she wouldn’t be ours.
You can see our beautiful daughter grow with her new family here.
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